Well just six more days to go, till I get to go home and unveil the new me well the new me in progress because I'm far from being done! I have 90 some pounds left to lose then the new me will be here and even then I have more planned! I'm just wondering if any of my friends on here plan on having any kind of cosmetic surgery done after they finish losing? I never thought I would be one for having cosmetic surgery but as I lose I see things that need to be fixed that wont go away and I plan on having a little nip and tuck here and there. For one my tummy ugh! My highest weight was 301 and I've had FIVE babies .... really big babies so the old stomach muscels and skin has been strechd to kingdom come! So a tummy tuck will be in order and my insurance will pay for one cosmetic surgery and I think this one will be the most expensive one so I'm going to do it on the insurances dime. The rest I want done will have to be on my dime though *sigh* My arms is my other problem area and those thighs oh my! And yes even now I look at myself and think hmm the girls could use a little perking up no I don't want implants I just want to make them stand at attention again lol! And I figure hell if I go through all this stuff and lose the weight I deserve to look awesome. 
Anyway getting back to going home I'm excited and nervous part of me is scared they will just see that size 26 woman I use to be and not the size 18 that I am now *sigh* cause most of the time over the last week I see that size 26 woman in my mirror and I wish she would take a hike! I use to look in my mirror and be like damn I'm looking good but lately I look in the mirror and just feel blah! I know its just my nerves messing with me But still....
Well I hope you all are doing well on your weight loss drop me a line sometime!! 
Adios!

Aspartame is, by far, the most dangerous substance on the market that is added to foods.

Aspartame is the technical name for the brand names NutraSweet, Equal, Spoonful, and Equal-Measure. It was discovered by accident in 1965 when James Schlatter, a chemist of G.D. Searle Company, was testing an anti-ulcer drug.

Aspartame was approved for dry goods in 1981 and for carbonated beverages in 1983. It was originally approved for dry goods on July 26, 1974, but objections filed by neuroscience researcher Dr John W. Olney and Consumer attorney James Turner in August 1974 as well as investigations of G.D. Searle's research practices caused the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) to put approval of aspartame on hold (December 5, 1974). In 1985, Monsanto purchased G.D. Searle and made Searle Pharmaceuticals and The NutraSweet Company separate subsidiaries.

Aspartame accounts for over 75 percent of the adverse reactions to food additives reported to the FDA. Many of these reactions are very serious including seizures and death.(1) A few of the 90 different documented symptoms listed in the report as being caused by aspartame include: Headaches/migraines, dizziness, seizures, nausea, numbness, muscle spasms, weight gain, rashes, depression, fatigue, irritability, tachycardia, insomnia, vision problems, hearing loss, heart palpitations, breathing difficulties, anxiety attacks, slurred speech, loss of taste, tinnitus, vertigo, memory loss, and joint pain.

According to researchers and physicians studying the adverse effects of aspartame, the following chronic illnesses can be triggered or worsened by ingesting of aspartame:(2) Brain tumors, multiple sclerosis, epilepsy, chronic fatigue syndrome, parkinson's disease, alzheimer's, mental retardation, lymphoma, birth defects, fibromyalgia, and diabetes.

Aspartame is made up of three chemicals: aspartic acid, phenylalanine, and methanol. The book "Prescription for Nutritional Healing," by James and Phyllis Balch, lists aspartame under the category of "chemical poison." As you shall see, that is exactly what it is.

What Is Aspartame Made Of?

Aspartic Acid (40 percent of aspartame)

Dr. Russell L. Blaylock, a professor of neurosurgery at the Medical University of Mississippi, recently published a book thoroughly detailing the damage that is caused by the ingestion of excessive aspartic acid from aspartame. Blaylock makes use of almost 500 scientific references to show how excess free excitatory amino acids such as aspartic acid and glutamic acid (about 99 percent of monosodium glutamate (MSG) is glutamic acid) in our food supply are causing serious chronic neurological disorders and a myriad of other acute symptoms.(3)
 

How Aspartate (and Glutamate) Cause Damage

Aspartate and glutamate act as neurotransmitters in the brain by facilitating the transmission of information from neuron to neuron. Too much aspartate or glutamate in the brain kills certain neurons by allowing the influx of too much calcium into the cells. This influx triggers excessive amounts of free radicals, which kill the cells. The neural cell damage that can be caused by excessive aspartate and glutamate is why they are referred to as "excitotoxins." They "excite" or stimulate the neural cells to death.

Aspartic acid is an amino acid. Taken in its free form (unbound to proteins) it significantly raises the blood plasma level of aspartate and glutamate. The excess aspartate and glutamate in the blood plasma shortly after ingesting aspartame or products with free glutamic acid (glutamate precursor) leads to a high level of those neurotransmitters in certain areas of the brain.

The blood brain barrier (BBB), which normally protects the brain from excess glutamate and aspartate as well as toxins, 1) is not fully developed during childhood, 2) does not fully protect all areas of the brain, 3) is damaged by numerous chronic and acute conditions, and 4) allows seepage of excess glutamate and aspartate into the brain even when intact.

The excess glutamate and aspartate slowly begin to destroy neurons. The large majority (75 percent or more) of neural cells in a particular area of the brain are killed before any clinical symptoms of a chronic illness are noticed. A few of the many chronic illnesses that have been shown to be contributed to by long-term exposure to excitatory amino acid damage include:

• Multiple sclerosis (MS)
• ALS
• Memory loss
• Hormonal problems
• Hearing loss
• Epilepsy
• Alzheimer's disease
• Parkinson's disease
• Hypoglycemia
• AIDS
• Dementia
• Brain lesions
• Neuroendocrine disorders

The risk to infants, children, pregnant women, the elderly and persons with certain chronic health problems from excitotoxins are great. Even the Federation of American Societies for Experimental Biology (FASEB), which usually understates problems and mimics the FDA party-line, recently stated in a review that:

"It is prudent to avoid the use of dietary supplements of L-glutamic acid by pregnant women, infants, and children. The existence of evidence of potential endocrine responses, i.e., elevated cortisol and prolactin, and differential responses between males and females, would also suggest a neuroendocrine link and that supplemental L-glutamic acid should be avoided by women of childbearing age and individuals with affective disorders."(4)

Aspartic acid from aspartame has the same deleterious effects on the body as glutamic acid.

The exact mechanism of acute reactions to excess free glutamate and aspartate is currently being debated. As reported to the FDA, those reactions include:(5)

• Headaches/migraines
• Nausea
• Abdominal pains
• Fatigue (blocks sufficient glucose entry into brain)
• Sleep problems
• Vision problems
• Anxiety attacks
• Depression
• Asthma/chest tightness.

One common complaint of persons suffering from the effect of aspartame is memory loss. Ironically, in 1987, G.D. Searle, the manufacturer of aspartame, undertook a search for a drug to combat memory loss caused by excitatory amino acid damage. Blaylock is one of many scientists and physicians who are concerned about excitatory amino acid damage caused by ingestion of aspartame and MSG.

A few of the many experts who have spoken out against the damage being caused by aspartate and glutamate include Adrienne Samuels, Ph.D., an experimental psychologist specializing in research design. Another is Olney, a professor in the department of psychiatry, School of Medicine, Washington University, a neuroscientist and researcher, and one of the world's foremost authorities on excitotoxins. (He informed Searle in 1971 that aspartic acid caused holes in the brains of mice.)

Phenylalanine (50 percent of aspartame)

Phenylalanine is an amino acid normally found in the brain. Persons with the genetic disorder phenylketonuria (PKU) cannot metabolize phenylalanine. This leads to dangerously high levels of phenylalanine in the brain (sometimes lethal). It has been shown that ingesting aspartame, especially along with carbohydrates, can lead to excess levels of phenylalanine in the brain even in persons who do not have PKU.

This is not just a theory, as many people who have eaten large amounts of aspartame over a long period of time and do not have PKU have been shown to have excessive levels of phenylalanine in the blood. Excessive levels of phenylalanine in the brain can cause the levels of seratonin in the brain to decrease, leading to emotional disorders such as depression. It was shown in human testing that phenylalanine levels of the blood were increased significantly in human subjects who chronically used aspartame.(6)

Even a single use of aspartame raised the blood phenylalanine levels. In his testimony before the U.S. Congress, Dr. Louis J. Elsas showed that high blood phenylalanine can be concentrated in parts of the brain and is especially dangerous for infants and fetuses. He also showed that phenylalanine is metabolised much more effeciently by rodents than by humans.(7)

One account of a case of extremely high phenylalanine levels caused by aspartame was recently published the "Wednesday Journal" in an article titled "An Aspartame Nightmare." John Cook began drinking six to eight diet drinks every day. His symptoms started out as memory loss and frequent headaches. He began to crave more aspartame-sweetened drinks. His condition deteriorated so much that he experienced wide mood swings and violent rages. Even though he did not suffer from PKU, a blood test revealed a phenylalanine level of 80 mg/dl. He also showed abnormal brain function and brain damage. After he kicked his aspartame habit, his symptoms improved dramatically.(8)

As Blaylock points out in his book, early studies measuring phenylalanine buildup in the brain were flawed. Investigators who measured specific brain regions and not the average throughout the brain notice significant rises in phenylalanine levels. Specifically the hypothalamus, medulla oblongata, and corpus striatum areas of the brain had the largest increases in phenylalanine. Blaylock goes on to point out that excessive buildup of phenylalanine in the brain can cause schizophrenia or make one more susceptible to seizures.

Therefore, long-term, excessive use of aspartame may provid a boost to sales of seratonin reuptake inhibitors such as Prozac and drugs to control schizophrenia and seizures.

Methanol (aka wood alcohol/poison) (10 percent of aspartame)

Methanol/wood alcohol is a deadly poison. Some people may remember methanol as the poison that has caused some "skid row" alcoholics to end up blind or dead. Methanol is gradually released in the small intestine when the methyl group of aspartame encounter the enzyme chymotrypsin.

The absorption of methanol into the body is sped up considerably when free methanol is ingested. Free methanol is created from aspartame when it is heated to above 86 Fahrenheit (30 Centigrade). This would occur when aspartame-containing product is improperly stored or when it is heated (e.g., as part of a "food" product such as Jello).

Methanol breaks down into formic acid and formaldehyde in the body. Formaldehyde is a deadly neurotoxin. An EPA assessment of methanol states that methanol "is considered a cumulative poison due to the low rate of excretion once it is absorbed. In the body, methanol is oxidized to formaldehyde and formic acid; both of these metabolites are toxic." They recommend a limit of consumption of 7.8 mg/day. A one-liter (approx. 1 quart) aspartame-sweetened beverage contains about 56 mg of methanol. Heavy users of aspartame-containing products consume as much as 250 mg of methanol daily or 32 times the EPA limit.(9)

Symptoms from methanol poisoning include headaches, ear buzzing, dizziness, nausea, gastrointestinal disturbances, weakness, vertigo, chills, memory lapses, numbness and shooting pains in the extremities, behavioral disturbances, and neuritis. The most well known problems from methanol poisoning are vision problems including misty vision, progressive contraction of visual fields, blurring of vision, obscuration of vision, retinal damage, and blindness. Formaldehyde is a known carcinogen, causes retinal damage, interferes with DNA replication and causes birth defects.(10)

Due to the lack of a couple of key enzymes, humans are many times more sensitive to the toxic effects of methanol than animals. Therefore, tests of aspartame or methanol on animals do not accurately reflect the danger for humans. As pointed out by Dr. Woodrow C. Monte, director of the food science and nutrition laboratory at Arizona State University, "There are no human or mammalian studies to evaluate the possible mutagenic, teratogenic or carcinogenic effects of chronic administration of methyl alcohol."(11)

He was so concerned about the unresolved safety issues that he filed suit with the FDA requesting a hearing to address these issues. He asked the FDA to "slow down on this soft drink issue long enough to answer some of the important questions. It's not fair that you are leaving the full burden of proof on the few of us who are concerned and have such limited resources. You must remember that you are the American public's last defense. Once you allow usage (of aspartame) there is literally nothing I or my colleagues can do to reverse the course. Aspartame will then join saccharin, the sulfiting agents, and God knows how many other questionable compounds enjoined to insult the human constitution with governmental approval."(10) Shortly thereafter, the Commissioner of the FDA, Arthur Hull Hayes, Jr., approved the use of aspartame in carbonated beverages, he then left for a position with G.D. Searle's public relations firm.(11)

It has been pointed out that some fruit juices and alcoholic beverages contain small amounts of methanol. It is important to remember, however, that methanol never appears alone. In every case, ethanol is present, usually in much higher amounts. Ethanol is an antidote for methanol toxicity in humans.(9) The troops of Desert Storm were "treated" to large amounts of aspartame-sweetened beverages, which had been heated to over 86 degrees F in the Saudi Arabian sun. Many of them returned home with numerous disorders similar to what has been seen in persons who have been chemically poisoned by formaldehyde. The free methanol in the beverages may have been a contributing factor in these illnesses. Other breakdown products of aspartame such as DKP (discussed below) may also have been a factor.

In a 1993 act that can only be described as "unconscionable," the FDA approved aspartame as an ingredient in numerous food items that would always be heated to above 86 degree F (30 degree C).

Diketopiperazine (DKP)

DKP is a byproduct of aspartame metabolism. DKP has been implicated in the occurrence of brain tumors. Olney noticed that DKP, when nitrosated in the gut, produced a compound that was similar to N-nitrosourea, a powerful brain tumor causing chemical. Some authors have said that DKP is produced after aspartame ingestion. I am not sure if that is correct. It is definitely true that DKP is formed in liquid aspartame-containing products during prolonged storage.

G.D. Searle conducted animal experiments on the safety of DKP. The FDA found numerous experimental errors occurred, including "clerical errors, mixed-up animals, animals not getting drugs they were supposed to get, pathological specimens lost because of improper handling," and many other errors.(12) These sloppy laboratory procedures may explain why both the test and control animals had sixteen times more brain tumors than would be expected in experiments of this length.

In an ironic twist, shortly after these experimental errors were discovered, the FDA used guidelines recommended by G.D. Searle to develop the industry-wide FDA standards for good laboratory practices.(11)

DKP has also been implicated as a cause of uterine polyps and changes in blood cholesterol by FDA Toxicologist Dr. Jacqueline Verrett in her testimony before the U.S. Senate.(13)

Well I know at least why I haven't had the energy to work out like I was working out at once upon a time! Man I was kicking some major ass then over the last few months I felt drained, exhausted, moody and depressed! The  other week I was diagnosed with Hypothyrodism which explains all that and then some! The struggeling with my weight sure I've lost weight but its been a fight I've worked and worked and refigured calories and trying to figure out what I was doing wrong feeling like pulling my hair out at times! Then there is my hair lol its been falling out like mad and the Hypothyriodism explains that too! But I really really want the meds to kick in I want to feel better I want to work my ass off litterally! :-) I want to feel normal again! Then again there is also this cold that is kicking my ass at the moment it sucks big time! So who has a cup of energy I can borrow anyone? Please? lol I'd surely appreciate it! I think tonight I am going to go for a walk tonight maybe that'll make me feel better!
On another note this Sunday is father's day! I have a present for the hubby all saved up and in a good hiding place but the kiddos want to go and get him a card we'll do that either tonight or tomorrow morning. We are also trying to plan a fathers day meal my daughter took home economics her last semester of the school year and she has a pot roast recipe she wants to try out so I think I'll let her try it out! And I'll do southwestern egg white omlets for breakfast. I got him a bunch of new shirts as he has wore the hell out of his old t shirts! 
Well I'm off have a great day y'all!

Skillet Pizza Casserole
Low Calorie Recipe

Ingredients:
4 ounces No Yolks egg noodle substitute, uncooked
3/4 pound ground chicken breast, skinless
1/2 cup bell peppers, chopped
1/2 cup onions, chopped
25 slices reduced fat turkey pepperoni, chopped
14 ounces pizza sauce
8 ounces fat-free mozzarella cheese, shredded

Directions:
Cook egg noodle substitute according to package directions.

In a skillet, combine chicken, bell peppers, and onions. Cook until chicken is no longer pink and vegetables are tender. Stir in noodles, pepperoni, and pizza sauce. Cook until heated through. Sprinkle with cheese. Cover and let stand until cheese has melted.

Recipe makes six servings.

Hello my friends here!

Well I'm like nine days away from going back home for vacation! I wanted to lose a total of 50 pounds before vacation time. I'm six pounds away from that and I only have till the 23rd don't think I'll get it especailly with trying to get my thyroid back on track. But I have lost 44 pounds since January 28th and a grand total of 60 pounds from my highest weight so people should be able to notice a difference right? I wanted to go home and wow everyone and I hope to accomplish that! I know by the time we PCS out of England  I should have reached my goal weight or be damn near it! My goal weight is 150-160 pounds I'm 241 right now. We don't leave here till December 2009-January 2010. I just hope they can see the difference in me because if they can't then it'll just make me feel bad. I can see a difference sometimes but at other times I look in the mirror and see that size 26 me instead of the size 18 me which sucks big time!

I'm feeling rather icky today I have a nasty cold that just may turn into bronchitus I'm debaiting on making an appt at the clinic I hate to show up and it just be a yucky cold and they be like whimp! But with the thyroid meds I don't know what I can take cause everything I pick up says consult doctor before taking if you have thyroid disease! Oh what a joy! I did finally break down and took something I had here at the house so I could breath.
Well I'll blog more later but now I need to make the kiddos some breakfast as it is 9:03AM here boy am I running behind this morning!

Hello everyone out there! I just decided to try out this place and see how it works for me! I normally use my weight loss myspace but I thought hmmm I just might give this place a go and see how I like it!
I will be using this site to journal about my weight loss journey and various other things that I learn and do along the way! I hope to meet others who are like myself trying to lose weight, or have lost a lot of weight. Others who inspire and motivate me and etc.
Here is a bit of randomness about me:

. I am 33 years old
. I am married
. I have 5 biological children and 1 step daughter
. I am almost finished with my BS in Psychology
. I love all sorts of music
. I enjoy myspace except for all the freakin' errors that seem to pop up from time to time and frustrate the hell out of me.
. I love the beach!
. I was born and raised in North Carolina quite possible the best state in the USA!
. I currently live in England because my husband is in the USAF and we are assigned to a base here.
. I love horror and comedy's when it comes to movies.
. I don't like rollercoasters they scare the shit out of me!
. I don't like being lied to or mislead.
. I don't like people who target me because I'm fat and they want to sale their weight loss supliments if they truely were any that worked everyone would be thin now wouldn't they?
. I cuss a lot sometimes so be warned!
. I like to write poetry mostly and blogs!
. I like meeting people who are going through or have gone through the same things I have experienced or are experiencing!
. I'm rather blunt and out spoken at times.
. I love to laugh and to make others laugh!

Now on to the weight loss part of this journal entry so that you can know more about that since I've given you my fact list by the way if there is anything I left off that you want to know feel free to ask, however don't be rude or crude because I'll just turn it all back around on you!
Well I've always been overweight as a child I can remember being at least five years old and being fat. I was picked on through out school it was horrible! The only happy part of my childhood is the time spent with my family and the few friends I had that didn't judge me because I was overweight. I dropped out when I was 16 because I was tired of it all! But as you can tell obliviously I went back at some point and got my high school diploma and my Assocaites degree because I am close to haveing my bachelors degree now! I had a bad first marriage that lasted almost 12 years where I was verbally, mentally, emotionally and yes physically abused in! The only good thing that came from that unholy union was my three oldest children that I love and adore! My children are my life! I am happily remarried now to a wonderful man (well most of the time lol there are moments where I don't like him too much but hey your going to have that in any relationship!) At my highest weight I was 301 pounds I swore to myself that I would never see 300 pounds wow wee boy was I wrong! So I got down from 300 pounds but didn't care to drop any futher until January 28th of this year. I don't know why or how but something on that day changed in me! Something snapped into place. I remember looking at myself in the mirror at my face in great detail and wondering hmm I wonder what you look like underneath all that fat? I wonder what you could have been what you could have done...and then from somewhere in me came this thought...it is never too late to be who you could have been and do what you could have done! There is nothing holding you back but yourself you are your own worst enemy believe it or not you are the one who shoves the food in your mouth, you are the one who makes the bad choices for yourself no one else does no one else makes you do anything you don't want to do. I knew then at that moment my life was going to change! And so it has! I weighed in that day  and the scale read 285 pounds I was wearing a size 26 jeans, and a 3x shirt....today I am at 241 pounds I wear a size 18 jeans, and a 1x shirt! However I just was diagnosed with Hypothyroidism which explains a lot for me, why its been a struggle to lose the weight I have but you know what I'm proud because I have lost weight even with this condition! That is an accomplishment to be proud of! So now I have just started my meds and hopeing that they help me get my thyroid right and that my metabolism will be boosted to where it should be and that maybe this will make this journey a bit easier but however I'm okay with the struggle...anything worth having is worth fighting for no one said it would be easy they just said it would be worth it and it is! Every time I put on something smaller and it fits its like a rush! Food is an addiction for some of us like drugs and alcohol are for others this will be a life long change it isn't a diet its a lifestyle change I do believe that with all my heart! If your sitting there reading this blog entry and you are thinking about weight loss I encourage you to take that leap into changing your lifestyle, its not easy but its well worth it!